Self Improvement Explained

Image: http://www.flickr.com/photos/olibac/ / CC BY-ND 2.0

Today I’d like to talk to you about your “comfort zones”.

• Where do they come from? 
• What defines this zone? 
• Where are these boundaries?
• How can we break free of these illusions? 

If you notice in the last question I used the word “illusion”.  That’s all they really are, just a figment of our limited imagination.

And I don’t want you to take me word for it.  Whatever you read on this blog, never take my word for anything.  Look in your own direct experience.  This is where true change comes from. 

Sometimes we have tendencies to believe people on their word or because we think we don’t know what to do.  I’m here to tell you, never believe an opinion without truly checking for yourself.  You already know everything you need.

So, what are some things examples of comfort zones?

• Not approaching a man or woman whom you are interested in because you’re comfortable waiting for them to approach you
• Staying home on a Saturday night when what you really want to do is go out and make friends
• Working at a job you hate because you feel like “I have no other choice”
• Staying in a destructive relationship because you’re not sure if there’s anyone better out there for you

Some of the above may not seem like comfort zones.  They may be what you’re calling reality or that’s the way life is or how about “That’s who I am!” 

But if you look closely, every example above has some sort of comfort in it. 

Let's take a look:

Situation: Not approaching someone

Comfort:  Knowing that by not approaching someone you’ll never get rejected, be embarrassed or humiliated.  So you stay to yourself.

Situation:  Working a job you hate

Comfort:  Not being disappointed.  There’s comfort in not going after what you really want.  You’ll never get disappointed.  You’ll never “fail”.

Situation:  Staying in a relationship you don’t want anymore

Comfort:  There’s no need to start all over.  No need to take a chance and be alone.  There’s comfort in knowing “At least I have someone”

The situations and comfort zones that I have mentioned above are not to take to heart.  They’re just some examples so you can check and see where you’ve developed comfort zones yourself.

What are some of your comfort zones?

Take a look at the comforts that I’ve mentioned.  Do you see any similarities?  Can you find any commonalities between them?

How about, wanting security? 

Wanting to be loved? 

We all have a need to be secure and to be loved.  Many times in our lives we can fall victim to limitations by not going after what we want.  By staying in a place of security.   

Stay tuned to the next part of this article where I show you some simple techniques to help you broke these barriers and live your life.

Rishi Pathani

Beyond Approval and Limitations